Born into Love
It was 3 a.m. on June 5, 2016 and I sitting in the waiting room of the maternity wing in a hospital. After speeding through every county from Kentucky to Virginia in a quick 4 hours, my parents were enjoying some much needed sleep. On the drive up I was pretty nervous. My older brother and his wife are having their first child.I was going to be an aunt, my parents would be grandparents, and my brother… a father, all for the very first time. Big things are happening here.
I started entertaining my boredom by watching makeup tutorials and wasting my paycheck to online shopping. While sitting in the waiting room my thoughts wander to so many things. I couldn’t help but drift my thoughts towards my future. How would my life look once I left that hospital building? I began day dreaming (or actual dreaming I wasn’t sure at that time of night) about the fall, going to college, marriage, parenting. Everything started rambling my mind before I even had time to absorb it all in. Who would I be when I was the one giving birth in a hospital someday?
My thoughts were constantly interrupted by the cries of newborn children. With each cry I heard I couldn’t help but get a little anxious and excited hoping that maybe one of them was from the little girl I’d call my niece. I knew when I saw my brother carrying her out to us all of our lives would be completely altered forever. How amazing is that? That one little squirming, screaming child could make so many people so happy. How perfect the idea of a sweet newborn child was to me. With each cry I’d get so excited for the day I will get to be the one bringing a new life into this world; an actual human being created out of love from me and my husband by the hand of God. If that doesn’t give you chills then I don’t know what will. A baby is the most innocent of all other things. A clean blank space with endless possibilities. A newborn child has made no mistakes, has no regrets, and has the purest of hearts.
When I think of the innocence of a child, I think about newly-saved Christians. The Lord tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:17 that when we are saved, the old us is no more. We become new creatures. Just like that of a newborn baby; we are new, clean, pure, beautiful creatures. Can you fathom that severity of that? Jesus Christ loved you so much, he died on the cross for your dirty imperfections. And farther than that, he chose to love you, forgive you, and make you new every single time that you cry out to him even when you continually choose sin over his love. As I watched my older brother hold his daughter in his arms, I could see the transparency, the overflow of never-ending love he had for his daughter. My heart was touched. For at that moment, I was reminded of the endless, merciful, infinite, flawless love that my Heavenly Father has for me.
I’m sure I’m not the only one who often forgets about how much God loves me. The days when I’m worrying about my future husband; wondering where he is and why God hasn’t brought him to me yet. The days when I’m scared for the future and the life I will live. What if I’m not living out God’s will? The times when I doubt the person God created me to be. When I’m questioning my worth. Am I pretty enough? Holy enough? Even the times when I ask for his Grace. At every single one of these moments, I forget how much God loves me. I know this because if I remembered, I wouldn’t be worried at all. I would know, that in the same way my brother held his perfect baby girl in awe, God not only holds me in his hands, but holds the entire world in the palm of his hand. How could I ever worry when I have a God as perfect as that? How could I ever doubt the plans he has for me when he loves me enough to forgive me at my worst? The God that sent his one and only son to die on the cross for my sins, is the same God who’s writing my story.
So today I challenge you to stop worrying. To stop fretting and wondering. The Lord of the universe created you just as you are. He has a purpose for you. Jesus is working in your heart and in your life. Whenever you feel anything less than perfect, remember that your worth is found in that of Jesus Christ. I have been reminded of the value I have in Christ by the simplicity of my beautiful baby niece. God looks at you the same way my brother looked at his newborn infant daughter. You are pure. You are clean. You are beautiful. You are forgiven. You are loved.